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4 Reasons Why Intimacy Is Important

4 Reasons Why Intimacy is Important

Why is intimacy important for (new) parents? An interview with Julie Sharon, a licensed clinical counselor who offers individual, couples and family therapy at her private practice in Amsterdam. She specializes in working with people transitioning into parenthood who face issues related to pregnancy, birth (trauma) or postpartum adjustment, couples who feel disconnected but want to make things work, and parents who feel overwhelmed by parenthood or who are seeking parenting support.

What Justifies the Lack of Sex? Nothing.

Julie explains: ‘If sex and intimacy are vital ingredients for a healthy, loving relationship, it warrants our attention. However, as a (new) parent, you might have loads of legitimate explanations that justify the lack of sex. You’re exhausted. You don’t have time for each other. You don’t feel sexy or have a sex drive anymore. However, there are many reasons why it is a good idea to keep the flame alive. When you become a parent, working on the wellbeing of your relationship is more important than ever. Reasons why it’s so important now include:

  1. Becoming and being a parent can be quite physically and emotionally trying. Being able to fully count on each other when caring for your kids and support each other through these tough times makes the path of parenthood a lot easier to tread.
  2. Your children benefit from your loving relationship. Kids learn a lot about love through example. Couples who have satisfying sex lives tend to be closer and exhibit more intimate behavior (such as kissing or touching) when others, including children, are around.
  3. Your relationship with your partner influences your children’s sense of happiness, health and school performance.
  4. A good partner relationship affects the parent-child relationship positively.


Listen to the full length podcast on Mum’s The Word, here.

This Post Has One Comment
  1. Hi Julie, I have produced a concept paper ( ) that has to do with birth, the birth process, humanising it and de-medicalising it. In Thailand there are so many problems concerning giving Birth. A lot of these problems lead to C-sections which normally would not have been necessary.
    Intimacy. Let’s say that we talk about intimacy, not in the sense of having sex but rather in the sense of having a private surrounding, being un-exposed to the public or unknown individuals, being just with the one(s) we choose to be. I think that then there are many kind of intimacies: The intimacy necessary for making love, and creating a baby. But, the longer I think about it, the more I feel there needs to be some kind of special intimacy during the birth process. Just like there should be some kind of intimacy during a burial. Do you know, by any chance, if there have been any studies about this? My theory is that the correct intimacy during the birth process with enhance this process to be with the least complications possible. I mean, a breach position is a breach position, and intimacy will not affect the outcome much. But, because I see so many cases of labor induction, or labor accelerating measures, where an easy birth changes to be a traumatic birth experience, I somehow feel this may play a role in the process. Would love to know your thoughts on the matter. You are in Amsterdam.. I am in Wageningen. Eager to hear from you. Frank Riezebos (Dev. Sociologist)

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